Girls loving girls who identify as lesbians. Well, good luck, Babe! Even in the progressive 21st century, the L-word still carries baggage. As mentioned in the previous edition, identifying as a lesbian opens a can of worms just from the word’s connotations. Navigating life as a member of the queer community is tricky. There are the patent labels and their latent associations. Then comes the daunting dive into identifying as a label. The last thing is the unboxing of each label to reveal a complex haul of bold flags, fitting pronouns, and communities within communities. To get to the Pride of the matter, one needs to cut through all of the red tape of harmful stereotypes that are sticky enough to taint all of the goodness inside it. Here are some more powerful women taking the stage to give a new voice to what being a lesbian means.
Singer-songwriter and producer Girl in Red wonderfully represents the healthiness of lesbian relationships. Her songs are love letters to the women that both stole and broke her heart. She is a typical teenager navigating her way through the scary world of first loves and heartbreak. Her song “we fell in love in october” expresses her affectionate feelings towards “[her] girl”. It represents a love so sweet, so simple, and yet so meaningful. In contrast to this, “bad idea!” embodies a steamy young love affair. Girl in Red sings about intimate nights with her lover, taking pride in her sexuality. She owns it.
While Girl in Red can be rather arousing, she avoids the typical inappropriate sexual exploitation of lesbians. Her music embodies a sense of innocent fun. She represents the balance that is often missed when portraying lesbian relationships, which have often been viewed through blinkers. Girl in Red shows that there is space for both the innocent butterflies and steamy fun, and she breaks the binary stereotype that there is always a “man” and a “woman” in a lesbian relationship. This binary notion holds two problems: firstly, lesbians do not fit into set gendered boxes such as butch or femme, and secondly, there is always room in relationships to be individuals, not mirrors of heteronormative relationships. Girl in Red highlights her capacity to show attraction in both stereotypically male and female ways. She conveys sensitive, feminine feelings as well as the deep desires often associated with men. Just as any individual, her desires move on a spectrum.
Then there is the current top of the pops – Billie Eilish and Chappell Roan. Eilish’s track “Lunch” had fans dropping their jaws with its breathtakingly sexual lyrics. While notorious for her expressive lyrics and style, she has never produced something quite like this before. One cannot help but sing along. Eilish makes it crystal clear that what she desires is a steamy “lunch” with a woman whom she is confidently and passionately attracted to. Similarly, Roan’s “Good Luck, Babe!” is just as powerful as she expresses her experience in a lesbian relationship with a partner who is unwilling to accept her own sexuality. Roan accepts this and wishes her lover good luck as she knows that somewhere in her future, she will be yearning for liberation. This is an all too real experience for many, where queer individuals deny their sexuality and live in shame trying to “stop the feeling”, as Roan sings. The other side of “Good Luck, Babe!” shows Roan’s need for a relationship in which she is seen and acknowledged. She makes it clear that she deserves to be more than a “love affair”. Her lyrics show the longing for validation in lesbians, wanting their love to be acknowledged instead of hidden from society.
These women are breaking down age-old stereotypes and misconceptions. The public has seen many sides of Eilish’s persona, ranging from green hair and her somewhat macabre songs to her uplifting young girls in the Barbie film with her song, “What Was I Made For?” Then she came out with “Hit Me Hard and Soft”. Eilish is clearly not fitting into any stereotypical category. Despite a few mentions of liking girls in interviews, she has not explicitly come out to define herself as a lesbian. Eilish is living her life according to her desires, unconcerned with trying to fit into any set box. For people like Eilish, “coming out” is not something that frames their identity, but this does not make her any less of a woman lover than Marielle Kraft or Brandi Carlile.
Roan, on the other hand, is very clearly diving right into her lesbian identity, which is also okay! There is no right or wrong when it comes to identification. Roan makes it clear that she wants to be acknowledged as a lesbian. Her attraction to women is something she highly values, and she does not want to be another woman’s experimental gain. Here slides in another misconception when it comes to women loving women: often, women will experiment or just have a one-time attraction to another woman. This is absolutely fine; however, if the expectations of the relationship are not made clear, it can be harmful. The misconception is that it is okay to play around, and no one gets hurt. Roan makes it clear that this is not what she is signing up for. She is a lesbian who wants to be in a lesbian relationship, and it is something she is proud of. She takes her label seriously, which she has every right to do.
After listening to some of these sweet and steamy songs, the word “lesbian” can be viewed with more understanding and humanity. With more accurate representation, lesbian relationships can be given the respect and dignity they deserve. One lyric at a time, the word “lesbian” can start to be said and viewed with more pride.
