Pssst… would say that Luminous were missed at the event, but in all honesty, they weren’t.Arguably the loudest performance of the night was Madelief – and Pssst… does not mean that in a positive sense. Pssst… was so traumatised by the Knolle’s hollering that Pssst… had to run to the Musaion to snag some of the leftover wine from the VIP function.
Olienhout surprised us all by doing the same moves they do every year and hoping it would help them win. Spoiler alert: it didn’t. As for Klaradyn, do you really think we all forgot Olienhout and Madelief’s Rag theme from two years ago?
Speaking of stolen themes: Sonop, Pssst… knows that Katjiepiering’s serries are notoriously forgettable, but we both know that in 2013 they had basically the same theme (and James Bond backdrop) as your Ienk. Still on this topic, Tuks Bophelong not only dethroned the previously undefeated Tuks Naledi by being the only other mixed res to compete, but they also had a very familiar mineworker theme (side-eyes Sonop).
Nerina were too busy waving at their mommies in the audience to care about performing well and spent most of their stage time getting choreography prompts from their HK.
Kollege were falling around and babbling incoherently – wait, is Pssst… talking about their Ienk or a Thursday night at Tennessee? Even Pssst… doesn’t know.
Olympus informed us that their theme was top hat, so naturally they pranced onto the stage wearing bowler hats. Olympus, you had one job. Pssst… also wonders why nobody has thought to tell them that the meaning of “swinging” has changed? Awkward.
Pssst… actually managed to like Magrietjie’s grannies theme, because Pssst… knows that old people take the best naps – sometimes they don’t even wake up. The Spikkels’ performance made Pssst… want to follow suit.
As for Vividus Men: Minions, really? Pssst… thinks it must be really disappointing to finally reach university and be made to perform as characters from a movie made for five-year-olds. Shame on your serrie HK.
In true Asterhof style, the Sterretjies performed an Ienk all about themselves. Their theme was “we can do it”, and whatever “it” was, you certainly did it, Asterhof. And to the Aster in the crowd with the “Asterhof #90” sign – congratulations! You accurately predicted Asterhof’s Ienk placing. Vividus Ladies ended up having a similar theme to Asterhof, just with less… Asterhof.
Ah, Kiaat, you’re always a treat. Despite your banner being upside down for the entirety of your performance, you soldiered on, even though Pssst… really wished you wouldn’t. To top off an Ienk that played out like a badly made surrealist film, the Kiaat men performed “Gangnam style”, a song that is more dead than Pssst…’s morals.
Erika’s “tribute to the airwaves” Ienk made Pssst… wish that Erika were actual radio stars, so that video could kill their performance. Pssst… would honestly rather listen to Jacaranda FM.
Does Pssst… really have to say anything about Curlitzia besides the fact that they were beaten by Lilium? Pssst… has a tip for you, Kloekies: it was probably because of the awful Liam Neeson impression.
Winning is something that Boekenhout takes very seriously, but it’s also something that they aren’t very good at. Of course, Pssst… knows that they won first place in the men’s category this year, but Pssst… also knows that this was probably because they had all their performers on stage at the same time for once. Starting to see a pattern, Ysters?
The minute Inca announced that their theme was a surprise, Pssst… was ready to give up. Inca, your performance was not good enough to justify such fanfare.
When Jasmyn took to the stage, Pssst… wasn’t paying attention, because Pssst… was too fascinated by their HK’s red hair. They’d be the perfect candidates for Pssst…’s new (fake) reality show, Home Dye Jobs Gone Wrong.
Pssst… thinks that Maroela has no idea what Fight Club is really about. Perhaps Maroela needs to become more cultured and actually watch the movie (or, heaven forbid, read the book).
Zinnia’s ‘60s Pixies theme was very entertaining, especially when they belted out that great ‘60s hit, “Shut up and drive” by Rihanna.
Perhaps the Mopanie HK might be better off teaching the Peppies some manners rather than trying to teach them how to dance?
Pssst… isn’t sure what travesties the new semester will bring, but Pssst… can only hope that you’ll send all your res gossip to, and that you’ll always watch your back.

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