No matter where you go this week, you will be reminded of Valentine’s Day and you may just be a little bitter. Perdeby has put together a guide on how to spend the coupliest day of the year when you are as a single Pringle.
- Go past your local Clicks and look at all the Lindt chocolates that will go on sale in the coming weeks while whispering, “Soon, my love…”
- Head to the movies with your Fellow Single People™ and ironically do the yawn-stretch-arm-around-the-shoulder move on one another.
- Take the sticker off your laptop webcam and bare your heart and soul (and other bits if you’re feeling wild) to the intelligence agent watching your every move.
- Go full anti-romance. Eat messy, unromantic foods. Watch plotless action movies (no Fast & Furious because See You Again is timeless and will have you reaching for tissues). Subtweet monogamy as a concept. Remove your relationship status on Facebook. Only listen to music with no romantic vibes. Wear nothing Valentine’s Day-esque.
- Do a bunch BuzzFeed quizzes that predict your romantic future, record the results, and start building a lawsuit against creator Jonah Peretti for when the predictions fall through.
- Check the weekly weather forecast and plan. What? You’re never too single to plan ahead.
- Find out your Pantone Colourstrology shade because it is hauntingly accurate.
- Check out your much-neglected Pinterest and plan the perfect one bedroom that you are going to have in the future.
- Go on a Wikipedia adventure by starting on the Marriage page and going where the wind takes you.
- Gather together the single squad and make one another Tinder profiles. WARNING: Friendships may not survive this evening